Like a broken record

It seems like I have fallen into the habit of posting, then disappearing. This time though, it's almost been two months. And holy crap, is that a long time or what?

A lot has happened since I last posted. Some stuff worth nothing, some not so much, and some just flat out is not something I'd care to share with the whole world.

Most notably, my friends "Spain and China" had their baby boy the day after Labor Day. We went to the hospital on Labor Day when mama was going through labor. We were there for 5 hours, but the baby had other plans. He was going to camp out for another day in mommy's belly. Wouldn't you? It was a fun 5 hours that ended in a dumb nurse yelling at us to leave. Really? What happened to being an angel? Not that nurse. So, I went back the next day and got to hang out with the baby. He's precious. I just want to hold him and run away, in a very non-kidnapping kind of way. I haven't seen him since the day he was born. That needs to change.

I had my last post-op appointment with my neurosurgeon. It was very uneventful in terms of what transpired during the actual appointment. He told me that I can now do anything I want to, except move heavy furniture. Well, DAMN, there goes my back up career plan. I guess I'll stick with my current job then. The fun part of the appointment was the waiting portion. Instead of getting there, getting in, and getting out, I got to sit around for TWO HOURS waiting for my appointment. That always makes me wonder WHY am I getting an appointment to begin with? I do have to say, it was almost worth being there for two hours to watch all the nut jobs who were in the waiting room. They were so crazy that I had to check a couple of times to make sure that I was not in the wrong wing of the hospital.

The runner up for crazy patient in the waiting room was an old man, who had the whole old man thing going on: the perfectly white hair, the wrinkles in all the right places on his face, the cane, and the slightly curved legs (probably from the adult diaper). But he was very together, and not at all frail. He was on the phone talking probably to his baby-mama, and sounded very VERY together. That's really nice to see, a strong older man, who's not falling apart. Then the most magical thing happened, he got up to ask the receptionist about his appointment, which I am sure, like the rest of us was delayed by more than a few minutes. As soon as he got up to go talk to her, his legs curved a little more, his back arched a little bit more, his arms started shaking, and the cherry on top of the "I am suddenly a frail old man" cake was his voice. He transformed his voice to this quivery old man voice who is in so much pain, and told the girl how he could not stand it anymore and needed to see the doctor. I was watching in amazement, and he noticed that I noticed his little performance. The receptionist went in, and a nurse came out to take grandpa in before he died. Then, get this, as he is walking away with the nurse, he glances over, smiles like the deceitful cripple he is, and winks at me. Oh, HELL NO! I wanted to get up and tackle him, but figured that I would have lost that battle.

That however wasn't the winner of the craziest thing in that waiting room. On the other side, there was this teenage girl. Sitting between two people that I assume are her parents, or maybe pimps. She had her legs crossed under her on the chair, her arms crossed, and she was rocking back and forth, like a mental patient. Her "dad" said something to her, and she started yelling at him about how the dose is totally wrong, and how she's going to die if he makes her take that dose, and how she's going to have a hard time cutting her wrists to get attention... OK, maybe not that last part. But she was showing them the insides of her forearms, so I assume she was showing them the scars from the last few times she cut herself. Her "parents" were trying to calm her down, but the emo teen wasn't having any of it. She started shouting about how her life sucks and how they don't understand. Right, we've all been there, you know, that stage where you are so deep and have this vision of what life is all about, but FUCK, the rest of the world just does not understand, and the having to follow rules is worse than being in prison. And PARENTS JUST SUCK! I just wanted to slap her. I went through that phase, but NOT IN PUBLIC! I wanted to get up and drag the bitch by her hair and slap her a few times around. Just watching that made me want to take out my car key and give myself a hysterectomy right then and there to make sure I never have kids who may some day behave in public like that. I could not believe how calm the parents stayed, which is exactly why I thought they were her pimps. If I would've pulled anything half as bad as that with my parents, I would not be here right now to write all of this.

Otherwise, life is good, and summer is coming to an end, which means I will soon curl into the fetal position and start crying about the beautiful summer days that have come and gone all too fast.